Please recognize the title appropriately as a "Seinfeldism." And please understand that this blog has evolved into more than just my PhD program chronicles, for at times, the action there is slow.
I need a new pair of sunglasses. My poor Ralph Laurens are easily 2 years old and showing some fashionista age. Not that I'm a fashionista. I hate shopping. How is this possible? I used to shop, I used to spend every last dollar on my credit cards to find deals in the pursuit of happiness. I'm not sure when it happened, but it's been several years now, I've reformed. I have thrown out so many things, some new, that I bought on a shopping spree and never used. What a waste. Life, as trite as it may sound, is not about things. It's about experiences. Now, before you pass judgement, I don't wear the same clothes for years on end, as if I've stepped completely off the fashion train. I shop online, and here's why: Shopping online does not expose you to shallow twiggy women, to screaming babies in strollers, to dingy stores with salespeople eager to earn commission, to size 0 clothing when you need something a little more - well, let's say - substantial.
I trekked up to the Buffalo-Niagra Fashion Outlets this evening in search of sunglasses - and realized why I've put it off this long. What a waste of a trip. I should have had a beef on weck and watched the Falls (even though I did have a really nice dinner - a much better way to spend my time and money). The sunglasses store was a disaster. When did sunglasses grow into the size of ski masks? Do people like looking like giant flies? This is a ridiculous trend that really should die. I ended up with nothing. I browsed the Coach store, my favorite handbag (I do hate to shop, but when I do buy, I want a great label - and one that lasts), stylish, functional, well-made - nothing. Even the Gap disappointed (my favorite online retailer, though). I left with nothing, just a 40 mile round trip, and $2.15 lighter from tolls. But, with the realization that nothing is worth buying at a mall. Now on to the web to find what I'm looking for, wine in hand, TV on, and no screaming babies. Ahhh, isn't Internet grand?